Who do I look like?
I looked in the mirror and wondered. A question others never ask because they know who they resemble. They have Great Grandpa Wilbur's hazel eyes, or Aunt Dorothy's freckles. Even if they don't look a thing like their mother or father, they can trace that special something to someone in their family tree. It may be a thousand branches away, but it's there - somewhere.
I imagined if I saw my birthmother or father across a crowded room, I'd know, by nothing more than a glance, I was their creation. It would be something deep and unspoken, undeniable. Right? Wrong.
My mom (My adopted mom is the beautiful woman I call Mom), like me, is a blue-eyed, petite brunette. People see us together and say, "Wow, I can tell you are related." We look enough alike to fool the masses. However, there are many differences. She has a nice pair of tatas, always has, always will. My chest was a full 32A, until I gained weight after having two children. My belly swelled, my weight soared, my ankles cankled, and my first child weighed under six pounds. I gained sixty. Shit. My 32As blossomed into 36Bs. Yowza!
Mom has straight, white teeth like a box of peppermint Chiclets. I have a space between my front teeth wide enough to drive a Cadillac through. Thank God for bonding. Mom has a cute ski-sloped nose and thin eyebrows. My nose is round, almost bulbous and my eyebrows - dear gawd. If I let them grow wild, I'd resemble Frida or Bert from Sesame Street. To quote Michael Caine to Sandra Bullock in Miss Congeniality. "Eyebrows, there should be two of them!"
Hey, that's me!
Over the years I've been told I look like:
Gabrielle Carteris, the token nerd girl in the original Beverly Hills 90210?
Kirstie Alley? Before or After?
Jennifer Aniston? Pre or post Rachel?
Lisa Marie Presley? Before or after M.J.?
Chewbacca. No explanation required.
It was all fine and dandy. I still had no idea who I resembled until I had kids of my own. Finally, I had two children and had a frame of reference. People told me my daughter's eyes were shaped like mine, as was her face, and the bow of her lips. I saw the shared traits. Family goes way beyond blood. However, I never experienced anything other than an adopted family. For the first time in my life, I could see myself in someone else. My heart swelled.
Fast forward to my first communication with my birth-family. We exchanged photos and compared features. I sent my the images to my friends and family. The results of DNA tests were still not in. Of my two best friends, one since the age of 3, the other since 8, only one saw a resemblance between me and two of my unconfirmed brothers. The minute I received the pictures, I knew the two freckle-faced, blue-eyed boys were my younger brothers. I always dreamed of having younger siblings, someone to defend, and as I looked at them, my heart ached for the missed opportunity.
When reunited with my birthmother, I was shocked to discover my great, great grandmother was Mexican. She had coal-black hair, dark eyes, and golden skin. What!?! The aunts and uncles on my maternal side resemble my great, great grandma, exotic and mysterious. If I saw them across a crowded room, I would never think we were related. I fry into the sun, my skin freckles, my eyes are light, and my hair is light brown.
Do you look like your bio family? Do you have a doppelgänger? Do you think you might be adopted because you look different? Do storks really deliver babies? Please share your thoughts and photos!
Have a fabulous weekend!
Much Love,
The Adopted Goddess
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